This is a re-post from the How to Talk to Yourself Better and includes a few updates and insights.
As a certified life coach, I am hired by people who do lots of personal development in their lives, one area of development being self-confidence in one's career, relationships, and overall well-being. Self-talk plays a key role in these areas.
Before we get started, yes, I said talk to yourself:). I am referring to the internal conversations we all have with ourselves, all day long! Positive self-talk is extremely important to our overall well-being, so here are some tips on promoting positive self-talk!
Remember why self-talk is important--simply put, our self-talk can impact our overall well-being. "Self-talk is something you do naturally throughout your waking hours. People are becoming more aware that positive self-talk is a powerful tool for increasing your self-confidence and curbing negative emotions. People who can master positive self-talk are thought to be more confident, motivated, and productive." (https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/self-talk#takeaway)
Replace & Reframe--When we reframe, we are changing the way we look at the world. This involves being skeptical of the negative thoughts that enter our minds. As Helga Klopcic and KC Harry put it in their book titled Remove Negative Thinking: How to Instantly Harness Mindfulness and The Power of Positive Thinking, “the key is to first challenge the negative thought and know that they were inaccurate, and then replace them with something more positive and truthful.” Example: “I cannot land a good job; I don’t have any good skills.” Now, is it really that the person doesn’t have ANY good skills? Likely not. Example of replacement: “I am struggling to find work but will exhaust all avenues and resources; I will also tap into my true passion and zone in on those skill areas.” Then begin to take action!
Affirm it!-- When we affirm, we have a statement of truth that establishes a specific course of action. Here are a few characteristics of effective affirmations: positive, present tense, balance(write affirmations for each area of life), and realistic. If it is not something realistic to the person, it may be difficult to stay motivated. Example: I walk 20-30 minutes 3- 4 times a week, and I am enthusiastic because I am healthier because of it. (For some people, a longer commitment of days and times might be realistic, but that is one example).
Remember, habits can take time to create and break, so be patient and persistent along your positive self-talk journey!
Be kind to yourself. You are the only YOU:)